I don't get it

So right now, the night before we're supposed to go to my in-laws for Christmas early, the night before I stress out, freak out, and wire my mouth shut for fear of standing up for myself cause my husband won't, his brother finally calls back.

If you haven't been reading, we have not been on speaking terms with my brother-in-law since early August. He pushed Adam away after a fight I had with him and his dad at the family cottage over me lecturing the 8 year old brother-in-law for being disrespectful after I yelled at him for coming into the ladies bathroom while I was showering 6 times, and I told him to get out 6 times, and when I was finally done and went to talk to him about why he wouldn't obey and simply leave, I got reemed out by my father-in-law and brother-in-law Brendan for disciplining Jon (the little BIL) for telling me I wasn't adult enough to yell at him and he never had to listen to me cause I didn't matter. Brendan and my father-law jumped all over me that I was full of "BS" and called me all these names I'd never use for anyone and said I was lying and Jon would never come into the ladies room, when in fact, I've spanked him (quick swat with my hand) on 4 different occasions for grabbing my butt, or diliberately walking in on me changing (the cottage bedroom and bathroom doors do not lock). They called me a female dog and Jon an innocent child, and because Adam stepped in and got us out of there, Brendan says he took my side and I'm a control freak and hate their family and should be disowned and their parents should never speak to me again or let me around Jon because I'm unstable. And, because when he told Adam all this and Adam told him he was out of line he decided not to speak to Adam anymore or want anything to do with us. He's turned their family against me though. Jon's only 8, and asks me why I try to keep Adam away from him and hate their parents, he asks me if I've gotten help for my anger and emotional problems, if I'm seeing a therapist, and he's 8! Obviously someone's feeding him this or he wouldn't know those phrases. He's got a volcabulary (I've soaped him twice for telling me to "f off") but it's not that good! Brendan's only communication was to Adam once, telling Adam to agree with him about me and "tell me off and put me in my place like he should have years ago" or he was no longer his brother. When Adam denied him, that was the end of it.

Now, the day before I'm stressed enough about their family, he calls, right in time to make me feel like I have to get him a Christmas present cause we have to see him again, right in time to make me lose it before our trip to see my family because honestly, I just want to ignore his existence right now. I know it's good for Adam to have his brother back, but seriously, now? Right now they're talking sports and computers like nothing ever happened and I don't even get an acknowledgement? I don't know, maybe I'm wrong, but I think I'm owed an apology, or at least an admittance that Brendan was out of line, by Brendan, even to Adam would be something. The guy's is 21 years old, has no respect for me, and no respect for our marriage, and now, he can call and talk sports and everything's okay? I don't get it. And I'm hurt by the fact that after this long it can just blow over this easily. Granted, I don't want to talk about it with him, but I'd like Adam to get some form of apology from him for me. Maybe I'm just nuts though...............